3 Months in a Nutshell

Well, these past three months have flown by for me! So many wonderful relationships, opportunities, and personal reflection took place that have impacted me greatly! The last three months I had in Dar, I worked as a volunteer staff member at The Ocean church, mainly with the continued development of the Hospitality Team and the youth group, Tidal Wave. I've been involved with the women's ministry, preaching at the church, special events with the church, and spending time with my new family, The Porters. It has been a rich experience, to say the least.

Our new women's ministry, The Pearls, has taken off to tremendous heights and we've held 4 events in the last 3 months, which were all successful! The last Pearls event I attended was a single ladies sleepover for ladies 25 and older. It was so much fun and I was able to make an energy drink we served at the Starbucks I worked at: The Planet Shaker....it sure did bring people to life when it was late!! My friend Gwantwa was so hyper, we had to cut off her energy drinks! lol These ladies are real quality people and I am proud to call them my sisters!

The Hospitality Team has continued to be a hit at the church. From our information desk, to our greeters, and our refreshment servers....all of our volunteers in these areas have been a blessing to the church and to me! We've created such a unique family feel amongst ourselves and I love each and every single one of them! Right before I left, the Hospitality team members took me out for lunch and blessed me with wonderful coffee, Tanzanian fabric, and a card filled with many beautiful words! I cannot even express the love I have for this team!

Tidal Wave, our youth group, was restarted during my first three months months in Dar. We have ranged between 2-4 and ended with about 6 teens. Each week we met, we discussed what the pastor challenged us with the Sunday before. Their answers were deep and thoughtful! The first discussion we had, I brought candy in thinking that I might have to bribe them to answer questions....I couldn't get them to stop talking!!! I just ended up giving the candy away:0) A pastor from the States brought gifts for Tidal Wave from the North Texas District office and the teens LOVED THEM!!!! The t-shirts, especially, were a huge hit! Thank you, NTD for taking time to bless Tidal Wave!! Within two weeks of my departure to the States, the girls decided they wanted to have a slumber party at 'aunt Holly's' house:0) (I very proudly accept that title!) They all came over, we made tacos, put on face mask, watched movies, made crepes for breakfast and just had a wonderful time! Tell you what, these girls can eat! I cleaned out the kitchen cupboards and fridge and they still would have eaten more! lol We ended the day with youth group and a water balloon fight!


Aside from the normal weekly routine, we held an Art Night, which was organized and run by very talented young adults at our church and included drama, music, poetry, and snacks! I have never been in a church where there is so much talent! Well....maybe the talent is always there, but they lack opportunity? Grateful for a Pastor who encourages using your gifts, talents, and passions to bring glory to Jesus! Overall, this community outreach Art Night was such a huge success that they were asked to perform it again and create future Art Nights! I love being a part of and watching the impact this church is making on the community!


There is so much I could write, but I fear this blog is already way too long! I am so grateful for the opportunities I've been given, for the personal investment from my mentors, and for the many incredible people I have come to know and love. 


With that said.....I want to share with you the question I've been asked: "Holly, will you come back?"...

Standing in a doorway in Zanzibar. 

With friends Carley and Kudzai in Zanzibar.

My henna from Zanzibar....I LOVE getting henna done!

With my Tidal Wave girls before putting on our face mask...

...after applying face mask!

Our breakfast together, which included some unusual food!

...crepes with nutella, fruit salad, pico de galla and taco meat!

They ate it all! 

The water fight after youth group.

Hospitality Team lunch

Of The 'Unimaginable Proportion' Variety

Opportunities of Unimaginable Proportion: that would be the theme of the past several weeks for me in Dar.


Besides the amazing opportunity of being able to stay longer and work in Dar with The Ocean International Community, I have been able to help restart a fizzled out youth group. There are a little less than 20 teens in the church that have been without a leader. So, seeing the ball sitting there, and with the encouragement of my team members, I picked up the ball and started to run with it! Yesterday was our first event! We had six teens, which may not seem like a lot, but for a first time thing with inadequate advertising....it was awesome!!!! I was freaking out the night before the event, "What if only 1 kid comes?! What if 2 come and its awkward for them?!" (I mean, lets be real...those years are already awkward and throw in the 'lame' factor of an event and you are ruined once they tell their friends at church!) I desperately wanted it to be a great time for anyone that came! So, Saturday morning I woke up and prayed, "God I am asking you for no one or at least 5 youth to come to this event." Might seem like an odd request, but any less than five and we couldn't play the games I had planned....small details, I know, but they were important since the main theme of our first event was a party!!!! Praise God, we had 6 and two college students who showed up to help! The teens had so much fun and were chatty and laughing towards the end of our time together (which at first I had to practically bribe them to say anything!). My heart is happy and I know they already plan on bringing friends to the next one in two weeks!! Please keep the Tidal Wave youth group in your prayers. As the weeks progress, we will be  adding in more in depth talks....ones that will hopefully spur on a desire to pursue their own relationship with God. Pray that God sends another leader in my place when I leave...a leader who will cause this group to soar far better than I ever could! Pray for the teens.


Another amazing, totally out of the blue opportunity happened last Sunday. Eva, a marketing manager for one of the largest private hospitals in Dar, approached me at church. She asked me if I would be willing to create a promotional piece for their hospital! I was totally stunned! This kind of stuff has always been interesting to me, but never ever would I have thought to seek a job like this. I met with her this week, went over details, and took a tour of the place and I'm excited to be able to work with such a reputable place! Not only am I able to gain knowledge and experience in this field, but am able to make a little money on the side! I think I'm still kind of stunned, but then excitement kicks in! :0) I'll let you know how it comes along.


Besides that, I have started my studies online, met knew friends, expanded the hospitality department and trained new leaders, had ethiopian food (yum!), and ...........am just so happy to be here.

Thank you to all of you for reading my blogs and being such great support for me during this time! Your encouragement is appreciated more than you know!!!!

...He calls to me.

Life just seems to be picking up, here in Dar. My days seem to be passing me by quicker and quicker, filled with small tasks that seem to take forever here. I fear that if I blink, the date I am scheduled to leave will be here! 
I've been enjoying my time here, making new friendships, seeing the Hospitality Team slowly grow and an excitement in the church about the new changes. I've been busy with the small "busywork", but really needing to keep the 'Main Thing (Jesus), the main thing". I will tell you that in the midst of the business of the week and the Sunday rush at Church, I have been finding Jesus tugging at my heart, "Come meet with me". Its those sweet moments that remind me of my purpose for being here, for life, really. JESUS. He is the reason I am in Dar, that I have breath and meaning in this mad, crazy world. He is my Source for everything, the Strength inside of me, and to try and live this life without Him, would truly be unbearable. 


Psalm 27:8 says, "My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me." And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.”

How sweet is it that He pursues us...that He calls to us, "Come meet with me"? His love truly is deeper than anything I could ever understand. There have been days that I feel His love so intensley that all I can do is cry...how inadequate a "Thank You" is in that moment! This is kind of personal for me, but I wanted to share a bit of my Prayer Journal entry with you from a few days ago. My hope is that by reading this, you would feel His love, your heart would be drawn towards Him, and that your understanding of how much He truly does love YOU would sink in:

Jesus, you are the ultimate pursuer of my heart. In the busy of the day, before my head hits the pillow, while getting ready for the day, my heart hears those sweetest, most loving words: “Come and meet with me...”

You satisfy and fill my heart with a love unlike any this world has to offer. So pure, so gentle, so intense. When I meet with you, you speak Your truth to me and remove the filth this chaotic world has covered me with. When the world says “do more”, you remind me, “just come to me”. When the world says you need to be a certain way, you remind me, “I’ve made you unique and beautiful. There is not anyone in the history of mankind like you.”. When things surround me and my heart aches with the desire to have the same, You whisper to me, “Holly, come and meet with me. I love you.”. How is it that whatever my heart craves, you satisfy with more intensity than the original object desired ever could? 

My heart soars at knowing you love me that much. That you care for me the way you do. You truly ARE a great God...a loving God whose love is beyond any understanding. My heart cries out THANK YOU, but fails to convey the depths of my gratitude. My heart cries out I LOVE YOU, but fails to convey the depths that I feel it. 

It is my hearts desire to honor you, to meet with you, to know Your heart. 

I love you, Jesus. I love that you love me despite who I am with all my insecurities and problems, despite my constant striving and failing....you just love me. You loved me before I ever loved you, and that fact leaves me speechless. 

I’m forever yours, Jesus.

Holly

The Opportunity that Didn't Knock

Opportunity: sometimes it knocks while other times it opens the door, runs, and jumps in your lap! The opportunity I've been given is one of the latter variety.


Shortly into my time here in Dar, my supervisor casually mentioned, "I wonder if there is a way we could have you stay out here longer." I thought he was just being nice and honestly, didn't think too much about it beyond that. It wasn't until I was grounded in my new surroundings, that I realized my heart was full of so much joy with what I've been doing out here! Every person I've met, every ministry opportunity, every learning experience I've had has brought to the forefront of my mind, the shortness of my stay here. 


My heart was longing to stay longer.


Several weeks ago, my supervisor called and said, "Holly, would you be willing to do school online this semester and how much do you think it would cost for you to live out here for a couple more months?" With each 'financial' hesitation I presented to him, his response was, "We'll take care of it." Well, isn't that convenient. Basically, this opportunity was gift wrapped and placed right in my lap....I just had to choose to accept it or not. So I began to pray and create "Pros and Cons" lists (which seemed to be quite lengthy in the "Pros" category) and pray some more. I felt nothing but peace. I've learned from past experiences that even though an opportunity is placed before me, they are not all meant to be taken and in those times of praying about them God has given my heart hesitation and many "red flags". This opportunity, however, was lathered in peace and much, much joy!


So the decision is now finalized: I will be hired on by The Ocean International Community Church through till Thanksgiving! 


Thank you, Porter family, Ocean staff and elder committee for this amazing opportunity to serve with you longer! My heart is very full of joy!

Millions of Stars, American Pool, and Gaining a Greater View.

Two weekends ago, The Ocean Community had one of its Young Adult (YA) Retreats. It was such an awesome time with great people on a beautiful white sand, private beach!!!! Much to our pleasant surprise, there were absolutely NO mosquitos (We were warned about the bad mosquito problem AND how easy it would be to catch malaria out there)! We played games, slept in tents, and some stayed up to the wee hours of the morning talking and catching up with good friends. We had great music being blasted from out portable sound system, outstanding food (I was the cook, so of course I was a little partial), and my absolute favorite: the evening service. Our first night at the bonda, our Pastor brought us all out to the shore (which was a little walk through the dark wooded area surrounding our bonda). People were using their phones for light to see where we were stepping. When we arrived to the spot on the beach where he would be sharing, there was one, small fire-lit lantern in the middle of the circle....and millions of stars. Because we were so far away from any major city, there were no other lights on the beach....just the millions of stars, the sound of the waves crashing on the shore and our pastor sharing about Jesus walking on the water and Peter stepping out of the boat to meet Him. Everyone sat silent, soaking in every word that was being said. After being challenged to "step up and step out" of our current situations to follow Jesus wherever He might be leading us, we scattered across the beach and had our own time to talk with God. This was, by far, my absolute favorite moment of the whole retreat!
Last Sunday our church held one of its Tidal Wave (youth) events. Emily is a lady at our church who works for the American Embassy and booked the whole pool and recreation area for our youth. We had a little over 20 VERY excited teenagers who attended this event. Most of them didnt bring a swimsuit (I forgot mine too!), but that didnt stop us from swimming in our clothes! How could you NOT when it was so hot outside and the cool, crystal blue pool stood alone....not one ripple in the water....not one person in there! Dont worry, though, because it was soon filled with many teenagers (and some non-teenagers;0) Emily payed for a catered lunch for every person there, 2 sodas a person, and then two other adults payed for ice cream for everyone. The teens were so blessed and enjoyed themselves tremendously!!! So, Emily, if you are reading this, THANK YOU for being such a blessing to the youth at The Ocean!!!
After the youth event, I took a car full of teenagers back to the church to wait for their parents. In that short time of sitting in the parking lot, they began to ask me questions for things that they are going through right now: do you think its ok to....what do you think about.....why does this always seem to happen...what do you do if your friends are.....? That time of brief ministry stirred my heart. These youth are so precious......and seeking. I'm so grateful for the opportunity to be working with them while I'm here! Below are some pictures from the YA Retreat and me with some friends!

The beach at the YA Retreat

One of the crabs he found on the beach.

Our means for boiling water and heating up our food!

Playing soccer and  "American Football" :0)

My friend Carley and me.

Me in front of a morroccan resort (I was only there for the free beach!)

Nairobi, Waterless Beaches, and More!

Pole sana (very sorry) for the delay in writing! I’ve recently returned from a week trip to Nairobi, Kenya with another intern and our supervisor’s wife. It was a 14hr drive each way that was divided up by overnight stays with some missionary friends. The place we stayed at in Nairobi was an AG Kenya missionary compound with a guest house. The house was very simple and plain, but take a look out the window and the tropical surroundings mixed with the sounds of monkeys in the trees was enough to make you feel like you were on your own little Swiss Family Robinson adventure! Our main purpose for going was for visa purposes to stay in the country, but why not enjoy great coffee while we’re at it?!?! Nairobi Java House, Doorman Coffee, and the Art Cafe were some of the most frequented joints. We were also able to visit a giraffe park, do a little shopping at the Indian mall, and just simply enjoy the cool, non-humid weather! I’ve now been back in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania for almost a week and my schedule is picking up! Planning for the church’s first Young Adult Retreat and our young adult small group orphanage outreach has been the bulk of this week’s activities. The group I’m involved in has decided to adopt an HIV/AIDs orphanage and tomorrow (Saturday) we will be stocking their pantry, bringing clothes for the kids, and ministering to the children and staff. I am so excited! Last night was my first time to the beach, here in Dar. I visited with some friends and then went out for a late night swim. ‘SHARKS!’ was the first word that popped in my mind. Being the wimp I am, I put on my swimsuit (just in case), expressed my concern for violent abnormally large fish, and began to walk down towards the water. Much to my very pleasant surprise, there was no water in sight!!!! (totally lucked out;0) It just so happened that last night was a full moon and it had pulled the water away from the shore for over a mile! The left behind rippled sand, seaweed, shells, and crabs was all we could see. So we began to walk towards the water...and walk...and walk....and randomly screamed as sand colored crabs ran by our feet. All I can say is (besides the fact of how happy I was that we didnt swim!) the scenery was absolutely beautiful, glowing in the moonlight! I came back with a great variety of shells and some wonderful memories with new friends! Last, but not least, today I visited a coffee shop that was started by Vineyard missionaries. My supervisors and I wanted to see the layout of their shop, get an idea for menu ideas, and to be able to talk with owners about their struggles and advice for starting a new coffee shop here. I will be going back, no just because they have good coffee, but to hopefully learn from them! Attached are some pictures! I hope you enjoy them!

Feeding the giraffe at the park in Nairobi, Kenya.

Need I say more?

You think you have ant issues? How would you like to have an ant hill like this in your backyard!

Alana and I right after we came back from Nairobi. She was excited about the new purse her mommy got her!

Photos from my Dagaa experience!

 Victor, Meshach, and myself eating Dagaa and oogahli (the white stuff).

 A sweet Tanzanian woman cleaning the fish.

The "eating with the right hand" technique.

Random Dar Moments

I am now nearing my second week in Dar. One thing is for sure, it is extremely different from the culture I've known when in Sudan. There has been a lot of learning, adjusting and silent prayers. I've been so blessed to have Natalie, Meshach, and Victor helping me manage my way through the hustle and bustle of this city. Little fact for you to think about when you are stuck in traffic: Dar has 3 main roads leading in and out of the city that were built for about 300,000 people. There are 6 million people living in Dar. Rush hour here is literally from 9:30am until 11:30pm! I HATE driving here! Speaking of driving, my housemate and I are getting a car in two weeks. I will be learning how to drive on the opposite side of the car, on the opposite side of the road, in the maddest of traffic and driving you have ever seen!!!! I'll definitely be posting a blog about my first driving experience here! :0) Other than that, I've experienced my first local street dining with Meshach and Victor. Its called dagaa and it looks like whole dehydrated sardines. I still get a lump in my throat when I think about eating it! It was great for the experience, but I will never be eating it again! Tonight is our church's young adult group that meets at my place. I was so blessed when last week the group decided they wanted to adopt and orphanage in the city. We will be doing our first outreach there on June 18th. Please be praying with me for favor with the staff at the orphanage, for God to supply all that will be needed to be a blessing to the kids and staff, and for the children's lives to be impacted forever!

If you haven't had a chance to visit my Prayer Requests page, please feel free to do so. I will try to keep them updated often. Your prayers are valued greatly!!!!

A Broken Flask

Trust is so foundational for any deep relationship. Complete trust. Yet for some reason I find myself constantly checking to make sure God is going to come through in certain areas of my life. As a friend recently reminded me, "God's trust is well earned". There is not one promise that He did not fulfill, there is not one ounce of deceit or foulplay. There is not one ounce of trickery or lying in his character. He is good and perfect, beyond what I have seen in this world or can comprehend. 


So why do I keep checking to make sure He is still going to come through?


Several years ago, I had my first opportunity to preach at Living Waters Assembly of God. I prayed and fasted and searched and repeated for WEEKS before my scheduled service. "God, what do you want to say to these people?". I heard nothing, found nothing, and continued my search until the Thursday night before the Sunday I would speak. That night, I was frustrated. I prayed and asked for wisdom, then slept. What I experienced that night was unlike any dream I have ever had before. It was as if I was watching the whole thing as a bystander, but at the same time I was the woman in the dream. Glimpses and pieces of the woman's face was seen, I could hear her panting and her feet quickly shuffling along the dirt road as she pushed her way through the crowds. Panic, urgency, desperateness were all the expressions on her face. The dream fast forwarded to her throwing herself at the feet of Jesus with a bottle of expensive perfume in her hand. Crying with a realization of who He is, she broke the flask of perfume and began to pour its contents onto the feet of Jesus. The dream blackened and a voice said, "What was significant about the bottle? It was broken". Then I woke up. 


This is my point to this semi-long blog: What am I holding in my flask that I am unwilling to break for Jesus? Is this unwillingness out of fear? Is this causing me to not trust Him to the full extent He desires? Sadly, I believe the answer is yes. 


Specific things come to my mind and it pains me to say that I have allowed the fear of them remaining unfulfilled, to come between me and fully trusting Him to the extent that He desires. Tonight, before I sleep, I will be praying about these specific heart issues that I have been holding too tightly to. If the significance of the woman's flask of expensive perfume was being broken, then that is what needs to be done.


Can I encourage you to do the same? Search deep, look for that hidden flask filled with the most dearest things to you, and surrender them to a God who is trustworthy. To a God who can do anything and everything above and beyond what we could ever have dreamed!!!!!

A Few Pics To Enjoy!

 (shown above) The "ceiling fan" in my room is literally a fan on the ceiling.

 (shown above) This is the Ocean Church's young adult group.

 (shown above) This is the end of service at the Ocean.

 (shown above) Little girl playing on the children's toys at church.

 (shown above) Alana found my puppet and decided to make it her buddy. Too cute!

 (shown above) This is an entrance way to a restaurant. Thought it was pretty.

(shown above) This is a first for me. Saw it on the side of a bar.

So Far in Dar

May 22-23, 2011

Sunday was my first day to visit the Ocean Church. Everyone I met was so nice! Charles, the pastor, asked me to observe their hospitality department to see how things are run currently. He has asked me to revamp the way things are done, helping them to be excellent at service to the members of the Ocean and all those who walk through their doors. I am very honored to be given such a task. A major part of the ministry that they are wanting to start is a new coffee kiosk. I am working with the pastor and his wife at designing a portable kiosk, as well as, training volunteers with making specialty drinks. 

Monday, I met with the Ocean Staff to visit the new church office and the possible new coffee shop!!!! It’s a bare canvas and they’ve asked me to help them create its portrait! What an honor! Everything from interior design to the name to the items being sold there. My heart is smiling wide! Monday night I moved on over to the new house I’ll be staying at for two weeks. After my trip to Nairobi my housemate and I will be moving into  a new house for the remainder of my stay. Lots of moving, but that is the story of my life. :0)

I will be including some new pictures in my next blog!

May 24, 2011

Today was a fun day. I started off with an Ocean Church staff prayer and weekly meeting. Several things were added to my agenda today and most were involving the coffee shop:0) Next, Victor, one of the staff members, assisted me with purchasing a cheap phone and minutes so I can communicate with others in this country! So happy to have that phone! I did some grocery shopping and quickly made dinner with my housemate before the young adults small group came over. I absolutely loved this group meeting tonight! These young adults are so involved and excited to reach out to those hurting in the city. As a matter of fact, this past Sunday the pastor at the Ocean talked about the fruit of the Spirit: kindness. They decided that they wanted to put it into action and within a couple weeks we are going to be working at and adopting a poorer orphanage in the area for a whole year! I am blessed to be able to help plan with a team what we will be doing! To say that I’m excited would be a huge understatement! 

I will include a picture in my next blog!

Fish Market

Today I had the chance to go to the Fish Market near the ferry. It was very.....well....stinky. I didnt come early in the morning when all the fresh fish is brought in, so needless to say there was not the largest or nicest of fish selections available and the flies where horrible! An Ocean Church staff member, Meeshach,  was our guide today as he took us through downtown Dar and the fish market. It was so hot outside, although I am told that its actually the coolest time of the year. All I can say is that with all the water I had been drinking I never had to use the restroom! Sweating profusely took care of that! lol 

Below are two photos from my adventure. I also had a video, but am having troubles uploading it. The first picture is Meeshach, Natalie and I at a cafe for drinks. The second picture is of some blue fish at the market.

Beyond What I Know

My first day in Dar is coming to an end and though some of it has been a blur from being tired, the rest of it has been lovely. The missionaries picked me up from the airport (which everything went very smoothly! PTL) and then took me out for breakfast to a french bistro for crepes and coffee. We sat outside and the breeze mixed with the tropical scenery was just what I needed after such a long journey here! The rest of the day I've spent visiting with the family and Natalie (my new roommate). I've also been going over my goals with Charles for my time here.


I'm not going to lie, I feel absolutely inadequate for this job. Everything I will be doing is beyond what I've ever done before and to some point, beyond what I feel I'm capable of. I had felt overwhelmed back in Chicago when I thought over what would need to be done while I am in Dar. Going over all of the goals today started to bring back some of those overwhelming feelings, until I went to God with it. 


I believe God has brought me here for this time for a specific purpose. He was not unaware of what I would be doing here or the measure of my 'adequacy' or level of competency in the areas of work I'll be doing. He knew and still He led me here. I have seen the Spirit lead me beyond my own capabilities before and I've seen His hand lead and guide everytime I've been in a situation that I felt was beyond me. He is the same God then that He is now and I look forward to all that He has in store for me. I'm excited that He opened the door for me to be here and I am so very grateful that He has the wisdom for every and any situation.


Let all the glory be given to His name!

On My Way...

Well, I am 1/3 the way towards Tanzania. My week before my departure was a whirlwind, but with the help of family and friends I believe I have everything in place. I still dont think it has sunk in yet....when I step off the plane in Dar...maybe THEN it will sink in! lol


My flight from Chicago to London was great. I sat next to two girls from Minnesota who are performing a symphany tour around Europe as a ministry missions trip. It was so exciting to talk with them about missions, God, and life!  (It sure beats doing my wordsearch puzzles for 8hrs! lol) On the shuttle from terminal 5 to terminal 4, I ended up talking with the only other person on the bus (besides the driver) who was on her way to Khartoum, Sudan. It was so neat to be able to talk with her about something familiar.


Now, I just checked into the Yotel for a few hours of much needed sleep until my next flight. Also, my feet are starting to swell again. I've been taking my medicine and will be elevating them as much as possible before the next portion of the trip! Please pray with me for the swelling to subside.


I look forward to keeping in touch with everyone over the next couple of months!


Much love,
Holly

A Good Reminder

This week I've been running through checklists of things that need to be done before I leave. Moving lists, school lists, medical lists, Tanzania lists....I've been busy with all the 'little' things and getting stressed! Then today in the car, a Keith Green song began to play. The rich words sank deep within me and my heart began to cry out its very words:


"Make my life a prayer to you 
I wanna do what you want me to 
No empty words and no white lies 
No token prayers no compromise 

I want to shine the light you gave 
Thru your Son you sent to save us 
From ourselves and our despair 
It comforts me to know you're really there

I wanna die and let you give 
Your life to me so I might live 
And share the hope you gave me 
The love that set me free 

I wanna tell the world out there 
You're not some fable or fairy tale 
That I've made up inside my head 
You're God the Son and you've risen from the dead."

It was such a good reminder that though there are things that need to get done, I need to keep the Main Thing, the main thing. HE is the reason I am going. HE is the reason.

His Timing Is Perfect

It's been 6 years since I've arrived back in the States from my life-changing 2 years in Sudan. Ever since my feet landed on this soil, I've been planning and striving for the day I can return to the foreign mission field. My heart craves it, the passion pumps through my veins, and I've prayed earnestly for the opportunity. During this time here, God has been working on my heart, on my faith, on cementing in me who He truly is, despite what is happening around me. Life has brought many ups and many, many hard times in these few short years, all of which Christ has shown me His FOREVER faithfulness and sovereignty. Yes, I knew this before, but the depths that I've experienced are deeper than I've ever had before. I've come within days of having to live in my car, no money for gas or food or rent, no job, family turmoil and death, everything I've held onto- shaken....but what I've come to know is His miraculous provision, His hand in every detail of my life, His deep peace, His strength, His faithfulness despite my constant failures, His unshakable foundation, and His love. 

While I've been striving towards physically being where I wanted to be, He has been working on me so I am where He desires my heart to be. Opportunities have arisen to work abroad during these past few years, and with every ounce of me I sought God for direction. His only pressing on my heart was, "Wait." Friends, I know that my working in Tanzania is only for this summer, but can I tell you that His timing is perfect for ALL things?....even for a 3 month practicum! I am confident that if He didn't want me there this summer, I would have felt the same impression on my heart as before "Wait". Because I am going now does not mean that I have mastered the Christian walk, learned all that I've got to learn, or deserve it! No, it just means that His timing is perfect. I am a work in progress...imperfect, but lathered in His mercy, grace, and love.  He promises us in His Word that He is faithful to complete the good work He has begun in us! This brings my heart much joy. He IS faithful in ALL His ways!.....and His timing is perfect!

Drum and dance from Tanzania

Beyond Momentary Relief

I was 15 years old, when I embarked on my first mission’s trip to Gera, East Germany. Little did I know that this would be the experience that sparked the beginning of a lifelong passion. The team and I worked hard to help restore an old church that had been overtaken by the Nazis during WWII. Even at such a young age, I could sense the lack of hope that seemed to dwell among those living there. The native pastor and his staff worked hard to bring hope to this communist-devastated people and I was grateful to be part of such a task.

 In the year of 2003, my heart was burdened to help the helpless. From the moment I stepped into the orphan wing of the Romanian state hospital, my heart was utterly broken. So many babies abandoned and forever branded, in that culture, as “unlovable” and “unworthy”. Scanning the room of filth-covered babies, I saw one little boy, Sebastian, who was not only labeled as “unlovable”, but was also mentally retarded. I picked him up and his little body stiffened from lack of physical touch. Tears burned my eyes at the knowing of the worth he had, but would later be told he lacks. Silently rocking him and praying over him, I wept and with a knowing that even if every ounce of love I had could be wrung out for him, it would never be enough; it was Jesus he would need. 

From 2003 to 2005, God opened the door for me to work in Sudan, East Africa. There are too many life-changing experiences to list here, but I can honestly tell you that I left that country of beautiful people, knowing what my purpose in life is. I left, not only with a determination to follow God wherever He leads, but with a knowing that I was created to love people with every ounce of love I can muster, and most importantly, to share the hope that is Jesus. 

To help rebuild broken pasts, to love the unlovable, to hold the hurting, to feed the hungry, to empty my pockets and give all that I have for the poor may help momentarily, but it does not leave a transformed life- It is only when these are done with the hope that Jesus brings; With his healing power that restores, heals, and makes brand new; With his freedom from the bondage of sin; With his promise of forgiveness and eternal life with Him. This is the Hope. 

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Sukuma Harvest Dance